//blog/the archives
I am SUPER LAME
posted on: 2008-03-15 at 10:21:00 PM
I feel especially bad because there's a WHOLE LOT to talk about! Every few days, something happens that's noteworthy -- and I tell myself "Hey Carl-- YOU SHOULD TOTALLY BLOG ABOUT THAT." Then a week or so passes, and the buzz of that particular news goes away. BLOGGER-MOMENT RUINED FOREVER!
Well, we'll start at the top. I'm unemployed.
I have been full-time Mr. Mom for over a month now. Being at home all day every day with my son is totally different than what I expected. I love Oliver with all my heart, and he is a really super awesome little man -- but OMG, there is so much that I don't like about being stuck inside these walls with his sorry little butt. As my best friend puts it: "babies are alarm clocks with no snooze button." Every day is dominated by his needs (again, I love him and I wouldn't trade the world to be without him -- but WOW).I get a few moments here and there to get personal things done, but I lose my drive within a few hours and usually "put it off until tomorrow." The reality is slowly sinking in that I need to find a new way to organize my time or my life will remain on pause.
It's almost like I have two needy dependents: my son, and this house. My son lives and breaths, crawls around, screams and needs immediate attention all of the time. This house remains completely still and emotionless -- yet it slowly decomposes and comes into disarray which requires regular, periodic upkeep. It's like fighting a tornado and a hurricane at the same time!
I have applied for about twenty jobs and have been officially declined by one, and have no responses to the others. BLEH. Starting this week, I am officially becoming frustrated.
I think the worst part of my unemployment is that I've slipped into a pretty icky depressive state. I do what I can (take walks, listen to calming music, have hobbies, etc.), but it is still hard to keep a positive outlook. I've been getting quite a bit of therapy through this, and after seeing two doctors and two licensed clinical Psychologists, it has become clear that I suffer from some form of ADD or ADHD (Attention Deficit / Hyperactivity Disorder). The docs think that I have one or both of the following: "Classic ADHD" and "Over-Focused ADHD." Each of which are very different and take opposite kinds of medicines to help quell the symptoms. The doctors are wary to prescribe the wrong one because if I take the "Classic" meds, it could throw me into a panicky state, whereas if I take the "Over-Focused" kind, it could cause me to basically become even more scatterbrained and irritable. I am still awaiting a final diagnosis (hopefully this Friday).
I've been battling this my whole life, so putting the spotlight on my "brain dysfunction" isn't really a big deal to me. But combined with this depression I'm suffering, IT SUCKS.
In other news, I've been slowly selling off things over Ebay. It's very interesting what things are valuable and what things are not. Example: I can't sell a like-new high-quality gaming video card to save my life -- but I can sell a BROKEN 14-year-old sound card! Ebay is like another universe to me. It's very interesting to see how it all works.
I'M FINALLY GOING TO UPDATE MY WEBSITE! WOO HOO! Stay tuned, fools!
posted by Carl
2 Comments: [ Post a comment ]
said...
Carl, don't be sad. :( I hope they figure out what's wrong with you because I want you back to your full awesomeness. damnit. Oh, and I love Apple Jacks.
<3
Nyckie
Posted: March 16, 2008 10:10 AM
said...
Hey I know how you feel its been almost 4 mths for me and i've applied to over 50 positions had 5 in person interviews but as usual i either don't have enough yrs managing or they don't want to pay over minimum wage for sales I will NOT take a minimum wage job considereing my last hrly 2yrs ago was 12 bucks or they say you dn't have enough experience so depressed? yea big time discouraged? yes beyond belief to just get best buy to even look at a physical resume is rediculous i know i'll have to work my ways back up but you would think i'd qualify for sales or supervisor I can do it I have confidence to just get them to give me a chance anyone of these company's is hard KARMA yea i get where ya cumin from i mention a job interview n its like a curse to my chance so i gave up talkin bout them but you mr have a lot of technology computer skills that any company would benifit from so good luck i'm rootin for ya
Posted: June 24, 2008 11:58 AM
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